Fourteenth Sunday after Pentecost

Don't Take Yourself Too Seriously

Humility is a virtue that is spoken of many times in the scriptures as something to aspire to, yet it is something that is not at the top of the list for most of us!  “Humble yourself in the sight of God” says the prophet – a nice idea but not something we find easy to do in this land where self-sufficiency rules!

The parable in our gospel reading today might at first glance seem to be a recipe for those looking for a way put a dose of humility in their lives.  “When you are invited by someone to a wedding banquet, do not sit down at the place of honor, in case someone more distinguished than you may come and say, ‘Give this person your place,’ and then in disgrace you would have to move down the table to take a lower seat.”  The prudent thing, according to this parable would be to be deferential to the other guests at the table, always offering them the best seats.  Then, says Jesus, “if the host decides you should be sitting in a more honorable position he can call you up in front of everyone and you will be honored in the presence of all who sit at the table with you.”  (Luke 14:7-12 paraphrased)  Heard in this way, the parable becomes quite disturbing.  It seems to suggest that pretending to be humble for a short while will in fact pay off later when you are exalted over others.  But we all know that false humility is not real humility at all.  In fact, the character in this story sounds more like…. Who bows and scrapes before ….hoping to curry favor and advance his own position in his masters eyes.

Humility is often misunderstood as passive acquiescence to another, always deferring to another, even going so far as to become a doormat and let others walk over you.  Understood in this way it’s fairly easy to look as if you are being humble.  In fact, it’s very hard to actively cultivate a truly humble spirit.  Throughout his life Jesus, who “was willing to humble himself even unto death on the cross” (Philippians 3:) as the writer of Philippians tells us, shows that being humble absolutely does not mean being passive, letting others “walk over” you.  He probably seemed incredibly arrogant to the religious leaders of his day whom he actively opposes over and over again.  He quite consciously breaks the Pharisaic law in order to help a fellow human being.  In the passage right before the story we read today, Jesus heals a sick man on the Sabbath blatantly challenging the Pharisees to counter him.  For Jesus humility was never about sitting back when someone was in need, being nice to those in authority.  It was always about love for his Father God and thus for his fellow human, letting that love rule everything he did. 

Humility will only become part of our lives as we begin to place love at the head of the table.  It is quite simple.  In every situation we encounter from day to day we have a choice.  We can approach it with a desire to get something out of it for ourselves, or we can approach it with a desire to give something to the other.  In a sermon on this topic the Rev. Sarah Buteux says “What Jesus is saying in this parable to tell your mind that is so full of itself, to take a lower seat and make way for love, love which is always looking first to the Lord and then to the needs of others.  Make way for Love to sit in its rightful place as the banqueting table.  Love is the more honorable guest.  Love that would without hesitation offer all the higher seats is the guest that must be honored within us all if we are ever going to be able to truly honor one another.” (Excerpt from “Humility”, a sermon by the Rev. Sarah Buteux)  In other words there is only one remedy for true humility and that is love.  And the way to nurture our capacity to love is to change the way we act towards one another.   When our actions have changed our hearts and minds will slowly change too.   

In a chapter on humility in his book “Sabbath” Wayne Mueller one of my old professors at Yale describes humility as a blessing that comes as we desire to honor the gifts of others, when we seek to use our own gifts to better the life of others, when we desire to remain open to the needs of the poor and the oppressed instead of judging and condemning those who are not like us.  He says, “The word humility, like the word human, comes from humus, or earth.  We are most human when we do no great things.  (When we realize that) we are not so important: we are simply dust and spirit at best, loving midwives, participants in a process much larger than we.  If we are quiet and listen and feel how things move (rather than forcing life to move for us) perhaps we will be wise enough to put our hands on what waits to be born, and bless it with kindness and care (for the sake of all)” (Sabbath, Wayne Mueller p.175).  I think this is a wonderful summary of the way love works.  When we are willing to listen to one another and wait until we sense something is about to be born before forcing things to happen, when we realize that we can’t do anything great apart from God, we will create a space for the blessing that come from a humble heart. 

When I worked at Berkeley Divinity School at Yale there was a wonderful woman there called Jackie who sat at the front desk as receptionist and secretary for the Associate Dean.  By the time I got there she had been there for years – seen Deans, Associate Deans, Faculty and Students come and go.  As you can imagine, in an academic institution where degrees and the kind of schools you came from were exceedingly important, Jackie was not always highly respected or well treated by some of the important faculty members.  In fact Jackie was extremely bright and could converse intelligently on pretty much any subject you could come up with, particularly if it had to do with art and music which she loved.  Jackie had a heart of gold.  She would do anything she could for anyone who came through that door.  If a student were lonely – she would have them over for dinner.  When a student had a recital at Woolsey Hall – Jackie would be there to support them.  She knew every single student, their spouse, their children, where they came from, and when they left she kept track of them, and knew how their churches were doing, and what they were up to for years after they had left Berkeley.  She loved every one of those students in her own quiet way, and they knew it.  Jackie made it a pleasure to come to Berkeley because you knew you would receive a wonderful, warm welcome. 

Jackie was a truly humble person.  She was happy to be sitting at the front desk at Berkeley Divinity School even though it was never a highly respected position in that lofty institution.  She was happy to be there because she loved the students and staff, and wanted to make their lives as happy and productive as she could. 

When we seek to live our lives with hearts that are willing to honor the gifts of others, with minds that quietly search out new ways to support and nurture those around us and with hands that soothe and heal and constantly seek to be of use to the larger good - we will begin to experience the blessings that come from a humble heart. 

In all things let us remember the words of Mother Teresa, “We can do no great things, only small things with great love, and we know that all love comes first from God.”  Mother Teresa 

Amen